Ladies and gents, I have a little story to tell you. It's about a pig farmer. A pig farmer called Dink Smallwood. This pig farming looser had dreams of being a warrior and a hero. But, his complete lack of fighting and, for that matter, social skills always held him back. Then one day, as he was off to get some nuts from a local tree for his mother, he ran into this odd old man. He told Dink that he sensed great magical power in him. The old man invited Dink to his house where they could talk, and the old man, or rather his magically projected image disappeared. After gathering some of those nuts, Dink returned to his village to find his mother and his house ablaze. Dink rushed into his home, but was too late. Outside, the townsfolk gathered, except for Dink's nemesis Milder Flatstomp. A bit latter, Dink got a message from his aunt in another town saying he could live with her now. And thus, our story begins.

The latest creation of Seth Able, a.k.a. Seth A. Robinson, the creator of the immortalized BBS door, The Legend of the Red Dragon, comes Dink Smallwood. This RPG is a crazy, funny, and innovative creation. What's more, it's completely, 100% free. You heard me ladies and gentlemen. Free. It is available for download at the web site http://www.rtsoft.com. It is made for Windows 95/98. It also has things called DMODs. These modules are self-contained story add-ons, which are, for the most part, made by independent programmers. These DMODs range from full-fledged classily composed RPGs to things like the DMOD entitled 'The Search For Milli Vanilli.' The DMODs are created with a program that is included with Dink Smallwood. The included DMOD with Dink Smallwood isn't all that long or difficult, but it is quite funny.

The control system for the game is quite simple. On the world map, you walk by using the directional keys. You talk or examine others by hitting the space bar. You select options and attack using the Ctrl key. To use the selected magic spell, you hit the shift key. You can enter the magic and weapon/usable item menu by hitting the Enter key. You can then move a square around and select which item, weapon, or, in a different menu, magic spell you wish to use. You can then hit the Enter key again to leave the screen. If the game you are playing includes a map you gain during the game, you then hit the M key to view it. The ESC key will bring you to a menu, which allows you to select if you wish to leave the game or change keys within the game.

Hands together fingers interlocked meaning. Football is brutal only from a distance. That's the smallest part of it.

The graphics within the game are less than today's standard high-resolution 3D graphics. The graphics do look good, don't get me wrong. But, as the old saying goes, 'You get what you pay for.' The graphics somewhat remind me of a bunch of children's action figures walking around a map someone drew for them to play on. The background is pretty standard. There are different repeating tiles on which trees and other items can be placed. Strangely enough, the graphics in this game actually look as good as other games made in 1998.

The sound and music of the game are what you would expect for a piece of freeware. Some basic Midi music and some .wav sound effects I could swear I heard elsewhere. The monsters in the game actually have some AI. Though, they still are easily avoidable, the monsters do know that they should attack you. One strange thing about these monsters that many other games do not bother with is making the monsters able to affect other monsters with attacks. This is quite a useful tactic for when you are lower in level and are fighting monsters that can kill you in a few strokes. It is always fun to get a pair of guards to knock each other's HP down so that you can easily get rid of the last remaining hit points and earn the experience.

Over all, this game is shockingly good for freeware. I suppose if you have ever played The Legend of the Red Dragon, then you can understand the quality. LORD, as it is called for short, is a stunningly good example of an early cross between a MUD (Multi User Dungeon) and a RPG. Though completely different than LORD, you can see the same styling in Dink Smallwood. They say the best things in life are free. I won't say this is the best game I've ever played, but it is quite worth the price played for it. Just kidding. The game is a good diversion from the average RPG and is just as addictive as any other RPG I've played. I recommend this RPG to anyone and give it an over all rating of 75%.